Let $G$ be a group generated by a subset $S$ and $H$ be a subgroup of $G$ generated by a subset $T$.
To check whether $H$ is a normal subgroup of $G$ or not, we must check the following statement: $$ \forall g \in G \: \forall h \in H: \: g^{-1} h g \in H. $$
Question: Does it suffice to check $$ \forall s \in S \: \forall t \in T: \: s^{-1} t s \in H? $$
I assume that this is true, but the proof of that seems to be really technical. Could you please help me by answering and explaining my question?
Any help is really appreciated!
No, it does not always suffice. Consider the Lamplighter group. This has two generators, $a$ and $t$, representing transformations of functions $f:\mathbb Z\to \{0,1\}$.
$a$ changes the value of $f(0)$, and leaves all others the same.
$t$ shifts the sequence by one, replacing $n\mapsto f(n)$ with $n\mapsto f(n+1)$.
Let $H$ be the subgroup generated by $a,t^{-1}at^{},t^{-2}at^{2},\dots$ You can verify that $t^{-1}Ht\subseteq H$, and $a^{-1}Ha=H$. Since $a,t$ generates the group, your condition would imply $H$ was normal. However, $tat^{-1}\notin H$.
However, this modified statement is true.
Proof The condition further implies $s^{-1}t^{-1}s=(s^{-1}ts)^{-1}\in H$ as well.
Next, for all $s\in S$, $h\in H$, we have $s^{-1}hs\in H$ and $shs^{-1}\in H$. To see this, write $h=t_1t_2\dots t_n$ with each $t_i\in T$ or $t_{i}^{-1}\in T$. Then $$ s^{-1}hs=(s^{-1}t_1s)(s^{-1}t_2s)\cdots (s^{-1}t_ns)\in H $$ since all factors are in $H$. The same goes for $shs^{-1}$.
Now, given $g\in G$, $h\in H$, we can write $g=s_1s_2,\dots,s_n$, where either $s_i\in S$ or $s_i^{-1}\in S$. Now, define a sequence $h_0,h_1,\dots, h_n$ by
$h_0 = h$.
$h_{i+1} = s_{i+1}^{-1}h_{i} s_{i+1}$ for $i=0,1,2,\dots,n-1$.
We can prove by induction, and using the facts $s^{-1}hs\in H$ and $shs^{-1}\in H$ for all $h\in H$, that $h_{i}\in H$ for each $i$. But $h_n=s_n^{-1}\dots s_2^{-1}s_1^{-1}hs_1s_2\dots s_{n}=g^{-1}hg$, so we are done.