I want to prove $x\delta'(x)=-\delta(x)$. What I did was integrating the right side around 0 (since both sides are equals when $x \neq 0$ trivially):
$$\int_{-\varepsilon}^{\varepsilon}x\delta'(x)dx=\left[x\delta(x)\right]_{-\varepsilon}^{\varepsilon}-\int_{-\varepsilon}^{\varepsilon}\delta(x)dx=0-\int_{-\varepsilon}^{\varepsilon}\delta(x)dx=-\int_{-\varepsilon}^{\varepsilon}\delta(x)dx$$
I see the right and left sides are equal under this integration, but how does that tell me anything about their value at 0? Couldn't the integral be equal around 0 in "as small interval as we wish" yet still the original functions get different values at zero?
Answering your question requires that we answer the following: if we have a (generalized) function $d(x)$, then how do we know that $d(x)$ is the delta-function? In other words, what is the definition of the delta function?
One definition is that corresponding to the sifting property: $\delta(x)$ is the unique function $d(x)$ for which $\int_{-\infty}^\infty f(x) d(x) = f(0)$ holds for every function $f$. With this definition, if we want to show that $d(x) = -x\delta'(x)$ is the delta function, then it suffices to note that $$ \begin{align} \int_{-\infty}^\infty f(x)d(x)\,dx &= \int_{-\infty}^\infty f(x)(-x\delta'(x))\,dx \\ & = -\int_{-\infty}^\infty (xf(x))\delta'(x)\,dx \\ & = \int_{-\infty}^\infty (xf(x))'\delta(x)\,dx \\ & = \int_{-\infty}^\infty (xf'(x) + f(x))\delta(x)\,dx = 0\cdot f'(0) + f(0) = f(0). \end{align} $$ It follows that $d(x) = -x \delta'(x)$ is indeed equal to the delta function.
Note that in the above computation, I use the defining feature of the "function" $\delta'$: for any function $f(x)$, $\int_{-\infty}^\infty f(x)\delta'(x)dx = -f'(0)$.