Please help in to understand why/how $$|\vec{a} +\vec{b}|^2 = |\vec{a}|^2 +|\vec{b}|^2 + 2 \vec{a}\cdot \vec{b}$$
My precise confusion is why the modulus is not included in $2 \vec{a}\cdot \vec{b}$ ?
Since if we do $(|\vec{a}| +|\vec{b}|)^2$, we have modulus sign in every $\vec{a}$ and $\vec{b}$.
The problem is that $|\vec a+ \vec b|^2 \neq (|\vec a| + |\vec b|)^2$, because $|\vec a + \vec b| \neq |\vec a| + |\vec b|$.
(Suppose $\vec a$ and $\vec b$ both have length 1 but have opposite directions; then you can see why it's not equal!)
You have to use the fact $|\vec a|^2 = \vec a \cdot \vec a$ and properties of the dot product to prove the identity you have above. Using the fact that the dot product of a vector with itself is the square of the modulus, your identity is the same as $(\vec a + \vec b) \cdot (\vec a + \vec b) = \vec a \cdot \vec a + 2 \vec a \cdot \vec b + \vec b \cdot \vec b$. Now can you see why it's true?
Note: I use the LaTeX code
\cdotto write the dot product. Even though they have some of the same properties, the dot product is not the same as multiplication.