Let $f, g: \mathbb R \to \mathbb R$ be smooth maps such that $f(a) = g(a') = 0$ and let $\tau, \sigma : \mathbb R \to \mathbb R$ be diffeomorphisms such that
$$ \tau \circ f = g \circ \sigma$$
Define $ord(f) = \min \{ n \in \mathbb N_{>0} \mid f^{(n)} (a) \neq 0\}$.
I am trying to show that $ord(f) = ord(g)$. I wanted to do induction but the induction step is broken since $ \tau \circ f = g \circ \sigma$ does not imply that there are diffeomorphisms $\phi, \pi$ such that
$ \phi \circ f' = g' \circ \pi$
Next I thought I could derive a closed form for the $n$-th derivative of $ \tau \circ f = g \circ \sigma$ but I can't see a pattern. The sums get rather long.
Now I am starting to wonder whether the thing I'm trying to show is even true. If it is I think the proof should be short and simple very unlike what I've tried so far.
Does anyone have any ideas on whether this is true and if it is on how to prove it?
Let's begin with properly defining the function ${\rm ord}$. Given a sufficiently differentiable function $f: \>{\mathbb R}\to{\mathbb R}$ one defines $${\rm ord\,}_a(f)=\inf\{n>0\>|\>f^{(n)}(a)\ne0\}\ .$$
Note that ${\rm ord}$ needs two inputs. In your question you introduced ${\rm ord\,}_a(f)$ but forgot to pin down the point $a_*$ at which ${\rm ord\,}_{a_*}(g)$ should be computed. This has to be the point $\sigma(a)$, because otherwise it is easy to give counterexamples, e.g., the following:
Assume $a'\ne a$ and put $$f(x):=(x-a)^2, \qquad g(x):=(x-a)^2-(a'-a)^2,\qquad \sigma:={\rm id},\qquad \tau (x):=x-(a'-a)^2\ .$$ Then one has $\tau\circ f=g\circ\sigma$, $f(a)=g(a')=0$, but $${\rm ord\,}_a(f)=2,\qquad {\rm ord\,}_{a'}(g)=1\ ,$$ since $g'(a')=2(a'-a)\ne0$.
(For this reason in my original answer I tacitly assumed $a'=\sigma(a)$ and then $a=a'=0$, which made $\sigma$ and $\tau$ diffeomorphisms with $\sigma(0)=\tau(0)=0$.)
Now the positive result: The function ${\rm ord}$ satisfies a sort of chain rule: $${\rm ord\,}_a(g\circ f)={\rm ord\,}_{f(a)}(g)\cdot{\rm ord\,}_a(f)\ .$$ Proof. We may assume $$a=f(a)=0,\qquad {\rm ord\,}_a(f)=p\geq1,\qquad {\rm ord\,}_{f(a)}(g)=q\geq1\ .$$ The following principle is an immediate consequence of Taylor's theorem: $${\rm ord\,}_0(f)=m<\infty\quad\Longleftrightarrow\quad f(x)=x^m\bigl(\alpha+r(x)\bigr)\quad {\rm with} \quad \alpha\ne0, \ \lim_{x\to0}r(x)=0\ .$$ So there are constants $\alpha\ne0$, $\beta\ne0$, and functions $x\mapsto r_1(x)$, $y\mapsto r_2(y)$ with $\lim_{x\to0}r_1(x)=\lim_{y\to0}r_2(y)=0$ such that $$f(x)=x^p\bigl(\alpha+r_1(x)\bigr),\qquad g(y)=y^q\bigl(\beta+r_2(y)\bigr)\ .$$ It follows that $$g\bigl( f(x)\bigr)=x^{pq}\bigl(\alpha+r_1(x)\bigr)^q\bigl(\beta+r_2\bigl(f(x)\bigr)\bigr)=x^{pq}\bigl(a^q\beta+r(x)\bigr)$$ for some function $x\mapsto r(x)$ with $\lim_{x\to0}r(x)=0.\qquad\square$
Since diffeomorphisms $\sigma:\>{\mathbb R}\to{\mathbb R}$ have ${\rm ord\,}_a(\sigma)=1$ at all points $a$ your original conjecture, interpreted correctly, follows.