As a PhD student in applied mathematics or mathematics in general, are you expected to be able to prove every problem, for example, in an elementary real analysis book? I know it sounds silly but I am wondering if I have high expectations of myself...
For example, some theorems in an elementary real analysis book have proofs which are lengthy and time consuming to understand. Still I try to understand them and manage to do so. But if you ask me about the theorem, say after 2 months, there is a high chance I'd have forgotten how to prove it. I might have ideas but I cannot solve it in totality.
What I'm asking is, I guess, is it normal to understand something in math and forget about it? Or does the fact that you forgot about it/how to do it an indication of not having understood the subject in full in the first place?
As you learn more things and get a wider field of experience, you start to be able to remember the ideas of proofs, and trust that you could fill in the details if need be. If you don't remember a proof, the goal is to be able to ask yourself, "why would it be true?" and then set about filling in the details of the argument.
So the key is to read a lot of different things, different texts with different emphases, and find the proofs and explanations that are the easiest for you to understand and remember. For every single book I have, even the very best, there are proofs in it where I think, "I would rather do this a different way."
A close reading of a particular text can be good as a primer, to boost your mathematical understanding, but I think proficiency in a subject requires you to learn in a "discourse" with several authors.
Collect perspectives!