On page 529, remark 4.9, in Solovej's article on the ionization conjecture in Hartree-Fock theory (https://arxiv.org/abs/math-ph/0012026) the following assertion is made:
Let $V:\mathbb{R}^3\to\mathbb{R}$ be harmonic and continuous for $|x|>R>0$ and $\lim_{|x|\to\infty}V(x)=0$. Then the limit $$\lim\limits_{r\to\infty}\int_{S^2}rV(r\omega)\mathrm{d}\omega$$ ($S^2$ being the unit sphere in three dimensions) exists. In particular the integral does not even depend on $r$.
The last statement is of course trivial for the case where $V$ is spherical symmetric. However I cannot prove it for the general case. My intuition is that every function that fulfills the above conditions must be (in some sense) comparable to $|x|^{-1}$ or any translates of that, i.e. $|x-y|$, where $y\in B_0(R)$. Applying the maximum/minimum principle gives me that there are constants $c$ and $c'$, s.t. $$\frac{c'}{|x|}\leq V(x)\leq\frac{c}{|x|}.$$
Your proposed lower bound on $|V|$ is not correct. For example, $V(x) = x_1/|x|^3$ is harmonic on $\mathbb R^3\setminus \{0\}.$ I got that example by taking the Kelvin transform of $x_1.$ Many other examples can be obtained this way.
According to Thm 10.1 in http://www.axler.net/HFT.pdf, a harmonic function in an annular domain in $\mathbb R^3$ has an expansion
$$\sum_{m=0}^{\infty} P_m(x) + \sum_{m=0}^{\infty} \frac{Q_m(x)}{|x|^{2m + 1}},$$
where the $P_m, Q_m$ are homogenous harmonic polynomials of degree $m.$ The result you seek can be obtained from this, although there may be simpler ways.