A set $a$ can be called extensional if it has the following propery: $$\forall b\left[\forall x\left[x\in b\iff x\in a\right]\Rightarrow a=b\right]$$ Based on this the axiom of extensionality can be formulated as: $$\forall a\left[a\text{ is extensional}\right]$$
How exactly should this axiom be interpreted?
I see two options:
1) The statement that every set is extensional.
2) The statement that sets that are not extensional are to be neglected.
The first looks like a statement of a dictator. The second more like an admittance that there is more, but that we agree to keep that out of sight. If statement 2) could be practicized then I would choose for it, but I have my doubts about that, which is the reason for asking this.
addendum
Inspired by comments and answers (thank you very much!) I have decided to share something about my motivation and also my doubts about option 2).
A set $a$ is regular if it has the following property: $$\forall b\left[a\in b\Rightarrow\exists c\in b\; c\cap b=\emptyset\right]$$ Based on that the axiom of regularity can be formulated as: $$\forall b\left[b\text{ is regular}\right]$$ This axiom can be accepted in the awareness that you just restrict your scope and focus on studying the regular ones. You could say that option 2) 'works' here. If $\mathbf{V}$ denotes the class of all extensional sets then there is a subclass $\mathbf{G}$ of regular extensionals. Option 1) applied on regulars says: $\mathbf{V}=\mathbf{G}$ while option 2) says: focus on $\mathbf{G}$. Here I prefer the second option. This is facilitated by the fact that the elements of regular sets are regular, which means that by focusing on regulars their elements do not get out of sight. It should be remarked here that you need the axioms PAIR and SUM to prove this. This facilitation lacks (or seems to lack; uptil now I was looking for it in vain) when it comes to extensionals, which was the reason for my doubt concerning the second option applied on extensionals.
I think that can be useful to start from the debate about extensionality in modern mathematics and logic, that dates back to Cantor and Frege and their researches about classes and extensions.
We can start with the (very simplified) picture of a concept or “universal”, we can symbolize it as $\phi(x)$, and its extension, defined as the set of objects such that $\phi$ holds of them, we symbolize it as $\{ x : \phi(x) \}$.
Following the discovery of paradoxes of Cantor’s set theory (with the Comprehension axiom : for every “condition” $\phi(x)$, there exists the corresponding extension $\{ x : \phi(x) \}$) and of Frege’s logic (with Basic Law V), several attempts was explored to solve them.
One of the most relevant attempt was due to Russell, in his Principles and then in the Principia.
The basic idea was to avoid the “language of classes (or set)” and adopt instead the language of “propositional functions”; think of them as “attributes”, and assume for simplicity that they correspond to open formula (i.e. to $\phi(x)$).
According to Russell, propositional functions are primitive, and classes or sets are reduced to suitable “abbreviations” .
The following comment by the logician and philosopher Quine (Whitehead and the Rise of Modern Logic, 1941, reprinted in Selected Logic Papers, new edition 1995, page 22) is a good clarification of the issue :
Due also to the immediate success of Zermelo’s axiomatic set theory as a mathematical theory, compared to the solution developed into the Principia (the ramified theory of types), the “more clear and economical” conception of set as “extensional” has become, since the beginning of last century, the “mainstream view” about classes or set.
In conclusion, referring to Malice Vidrine’s answer, I think that is perfectly possible to think of “abandoning” our “intuitions about sets”: from one side, we have a lot of interesting results based on extensional set theory; form the other side, we need support for “a case for deviation from it”.